When I watched this I was impressed that they could fit 3 hours of tropey crap into 15 minutes

the woods behind my dad’s house became our Vietnam

You know what, fuck it, I'm doing it.

Games that turn your brain off and help your poop.

What kind of idiot falls for video game cross promotions on things they don't already buy? This one.

It was, as my mother used to say, "classy as fuck."

I rolled a level one accountant. "We should invest this."

I stood there with my dang-dang flapping in the wind. 

I was still innocent, naive to the cruelties of the sea, unaware of how it can make a man go mad as he stares into those murky blue depths. I would soon lean.